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"In one of their houses," continued Lona, "sits the biggest and fattest of them--so proud that nobody can
see him; and the giants go to his house at certain times, and call out to him, and tell him how fat he is,
and beg him to make them strong to eat more and grow fat like him."
The rumour at length reached my ears that Blunty had vanished. I saw a few grave faces among the
bigger ones, but he did not seem to be much missed.
The next morning Lona came to me and whispered, "Look! look there--by that quince-tree: that is the
giant that was Blunty!--Would you have known him?"
"Never," I answered. "--But now you tell me, I could fancy it might be Blunty staring through a fog! He
does look stupid!"
"He is for ever eating those apples now!" she said. "That is what comes of Little Ones that won't be
little!"
"They call it growing-up in my world!" I said to myself. "If only she would teach me to grow the other
way, and become a Little One!--Shall I ever be able to laugh like them?"
I had had the chance, and had flung it from me! Blunty and I were alike! He did not know his loss, and I
had to be taught mine!
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Lilith -- A CRISIS -- chapter xiv
chapter xiv
A CRISIS
FOR a time I had no desire save to spend my life with the Little Ones. But soon other thoughts and
feelings began to influence me. First awoke the vague sense that I ought to be doing something; that I
was not meant for the fattening of boors! Then it came to me that I was in a marvellous world, of which
it was assuredly my business to discover the ways and laws; and that, if I would do anything in return for
the children's goodness, I must learn more about them than they could tell me, and to that end must be
free. Surely, I thought, no suppression of their growth can be essential to their loveliness and truth and
purity! Not in any world could the possibility exist of such a discord between constitution and its natural
outcome! Life and law cannot be so at variance that perfection must be gained by thwarting
development! But the growth of the Little Ones was arrested! something interfered with it: what was it?
Lona seemed the eldest of them, yet not more than fifteen, and had been long in charge of a multitude, in
semblance and mostly in behaviour merest children, who regarded her as their mother! Were they
growing at all? I doubted it. Of time they had scarcely the idea; of their own age they knew nothing!
Lona herself thought she had lived always! Full of wisdom and empty of knowledge, she was at once
their Love and their Law! But what seemed to me her ignorance might in truth be my own lack of
insight! Her one anxiety plainly was, that her Little Ones should not grow, and change into bad giants!
Their "good giant" was bound to do his best for them: without more knowledge of their nature, and some
knowledge of their history, he could do nothing, and must therefore leave them! They would only be as
they were before; they had in no way become dependent on me; they were still my protectors, I was not
theirs; my presence but brought them more in danger of their idiotic neighbours! I longed to teach them
many things: I must first understand more of those I would teach! Knowledge no doubt made bad people
worse, but it must make good people better! I was convinced they would learn mathematics; and might
they not be taught to write down the dainty melodies they murmured and forgot?
The conclusion was, that I must rise and continue my travels, in the hope of coming upon some
elucidation of the fortunes and destiny of the bewitching little creatures.
My design, however, would not so soon have passed into action, but for what now occurred.
To prepare them for my temporary absence, I was one day telling them while at work that I would long
ago have left the bad giants, but that I loved the Little Ones so much--when, as by one accord, they came
rushing and crowding upon me; they scrambled over each other and up the tree and dropped on my head,
until I was nearly smothered. With three very little ones in my arms, one on each shoulder clinging to my
neck, one standing straight up on my head, four or five holding me fast by the legs, others grappling my
body and arms, and a multitude climbing and descending upon these, I was helpless as one overwhelmed
by lava. Absorbed in the merry struggle, not one of them saw my tyrant coming until he was almost upon
me. With just one cry of "Take care, good giant!" they ran from me like mice, they dropped from me like
hedgehogs, they flew from me up the tree like squirrels, and the same moment, sharp round the stem
came the bad giant, and dealt me such a blow on the head with a stick that I fell to the ground. The
children told me afterward that they sent him "such a many bumps of big apples and stones" that he was
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